BDSM contacts – Part Two of What is been a sub? What is a submissive?

Part Two – What is been a sub? What is a submissive? Whats the differance betwwen a submissive and a slave?

Just like a Master or a Mistress is treated well, I’d like to think and I believe that all submissives be treated the same. I respect my submissive Jeremy and I trust him to trust me. He offered his body to me, to do as I pleased, I take him to places he has never been before and then some. We discuss where we want to go during our special time together and if at any stage I know he doesn’t like something I stop.

I never expect him to address me as Mistress Marie or even Lady Marie, a true Dom should never ever demand respect they command it and for some reason I believe they earn it.

Always remember that submissives are true people, they have their own identity and they do have a voice, so listen to them and they will listen, respect and look to you for guidance. And remember that just like a real couple, both partners have to trust each other completely. Trust trust to me is knowing, one’s limits, being honest to each other’s needs, communicating and sharing.

If that trust is not there, then just like a real partnership, a real couple it can almost be stopped dead in its tracks and it can fail. Most of us already know what happens or have heard of someone that has been in a relationship that has failed it can mean, physical and emotional issues develop and that is not good.

Now not all submissives are into pain. However some limitations can be set with a Master or Mistress pushing those limits or boundaries to see how far you or other submissives can go. In each session I have with Jeremy I push the boundaries because even though he says he has no boundaries or limitations, I do not want to go too far with him, until I know he can appreciate and accept the pleasure and the pain that I am prepared to give.

I’ve written many words since I was asked that question what happens if a submissive says no well let me say that I honestly don’t believe a submissive should be punished if the Dom / Master / Mistress has pushed the boundaries or the limits too far and the submissive can not handle or accept the demand, the order or the request. However having said that, a submissive should be disciplined or punished if he or she does something wrong failing to do that is a failure on the part of the Dom, Master or Mistress. A submissive should never be punished for something that is out of his or her control.

As the relationship between Dom and submissive grow and the limitations seem to be less, the punishment should also be less as time goes on of course the challenge for the Dom is to train the submissive so that the punishment eventually is very rare.

I’ll finish this article here, only because there is so much more to tell

In my next article I will discuss the safeword, different submissives, pain and pleasure along with safety and health issues.

Until then

Marie